STUFF

So let me preface. The last few months the nesting instinct that is so common in pregnant mothers has really kicked in. And what that translates to is an obsessive need to CLEAN, and to GET RID OF STUFF. Namely, stuff that I either a.) no longer need/use, or b.) is no longer useable. This has included stuff that belonged to Boba; namely, clothes and other miscellaneous items that no longer fit her or interest her.

This nesting instinct, though mostly innate, is also partially driven by the fact that we have a small house and therefore, there is not a lot of room to store useless stuff. So, one day I had the opportunity to sift through all of Boba's old stuff and divvy everything into 4 groups:

1. Stuff that can be reused by Fox
2. Stuff that could be given to friends who were having baby girls
3. Stuff that could be sold
4. Stuff that could be given away

(There is a pecking order present in this list that should suggest the quality of the stuff. For example, I would not give my friends a pink onesie that has been drawn on with magic marker, but since it was still perfectly wearable I was happy to donate it to someone who wanted or needed it. You see?)

And so, I went about giving stuff away. Friends received stuff that still had labels on them or had never been worn - and believe me, there were a LOT of those items - and a box labeled "Fox" was put away in a closet somewhere with gender-neutral baby clothes. We had a moderately successful garage sale in Mid-May (I say "moderately" because although we made pretty decent $$, there was still a LOT of stuff left over). I joined Freecycle.org and gave away bags of clothes to people who wanted them. And a LOT of stuff was given away to the Salvation Army and Goodwill.

And I felt pretty damned pleased with myself after getting rid of all that stuff.

It made me realize what out-of-control consumers we can be without even realizing it. It's no question how easy it is to buy stuff you think you need when you have your first child. For instance I got one of those super-cute shopping cart covers for babies, you know, for them to sit in while you're grocery shopping?? Only Boba hated it with a passion. She didn't want go near it. And because I was so obsessed with getting the "right" one, I spent something like $35 for it. Well, that was a wasted $35 because I think I actually used it - or attempted to use it - twice. After that it went into the closet and sat. So imagine my pleasure when I was able to sell it for $20 to someone who went CRAZY for it. I mean, CRAZY! She loved it! She knew her daughter would love it!

So anyway, this has been a long-winded way to say....I'm not really into stuff anymore, much less when it comes to babies. We have a lot of things that are going to be handed down to Fox, both in toys and clothing, so I think we're okay there....although obviously we'll still be getting stuff for him since he's a boy. I'll probably do more shopping at resale stores, though, knowing now how quickly babies go through their things. And fortunately, we have a lot of non-gender-specific toys that he can enjoy, as well as bouncers, swings, and the like. So I think we're covered, for the most part.

Which is why, when the topic of a baby shower is broached, I'm slightly uncomfortable. We're not registering for anything - although frankly I wish I could register for frozen lasagnas and maid service. THOSE are the things that will really help when Fox is born! But I realize that people just want to celebrate and share in the joy, and giving gifts is part of that tradition. And of course, I am nothing but grateful for all the people who love and support us.

So, if I can just throw in my two cents - and you're one of the people planning to get us something - let me say this: functional boy clothes (nothing fancy) or diapers would be great. And if you make good casseroles, well...those aren't bad either!

Before I finish, I'd like to mention that it was in this spirit of generosity and love and support and NO STUFF that I was given a Mother's Blessing on Sunday night. I'll talk about it in a separate post, but let's just say that it was really the BEST thing a mother could have ever received.